definition and irony.

22 Mar

It strikes me how ironic we are, as human beings. We want to understand others, therefore we probe into their lives, we stay connected via social media sites, we want to read about people’s lives, know their secret – hell, where does our love of gossip come from? We want to stand in the room of the judge, not the one being judged. We want to look through a window to other people going about their daily life, and we want to judge them and define them. But getting to know someone is mutual, not just me knowing something about someone else. That’s biased, we don’t give them a say in our judgments, especially if we already believe its absolutism.

However, when the role is switched, we don’t want other people defining us. We’re okay with them knowing details or happenings, or even secrets, but we’re afraid of being defined. Being characterized, being categorized, being judged. We try so hard to understand others, but once they get to know us more than we know them, or even maybe, a little bit more than before, we attempt to convince them that we can’t be so easily defined.

We don’t want to be defined. We detest the chilling impersonal accuracy, the aligned predictability of core values, the generalized flaws. We want to be mysterious, interesting, complex. Maybe that’s why people get themselves tangled up in drama, because they look for drama to get tangled up in. we don’t want to admit our own severe simplicity. We don’t want people to see directly into our inner self and categorize us. How can you claim to know me when you haven’t even lived in my shoes? How dare you look at me and categorize me like such? I…I’m not like that! How dare you judge me and my actions/words when you don’t even know me, and just group me together with those people? How dare you.

Once we feel like another person has invaded our lives with such a disturbing act, we may even use everything in our faculty or go to extremes just to disprove them, and their conjectures of our predictability, regardless of how unnatural these actions are to us. We don’t want to be shelved or trapped and limited in those steel, impermeable categories. We try so hard to escape the clutches of another person — we want other people in our lives, we want to be helped and sympathized with and appreciated, but not so much that we feel that they have practically taken control or can predict our every word and action. We want to be invested in, but we want to hold at least 51% of the shares, hold most of the cards. We want control over our lives, so we feel free to do whatever, but with the support of other people. We want to be understood, but only mildly, partially, in moderation. We don’t want to become predictable. There is an innate fear in us of people who see through us, to our vulnerable heart and soul, that if people are able to understand the intricacies of our internal clockwork, what makes us tick, if they can predict when our hands will turn from twelve to one, or two, and so on, that will give them a rather considerable and uncomfortable amount of power and control over us. Too much power and control, too much room for manipulation.

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4 Responses to “definition and irony.”

  1. eri March 25, 2012 at 11:03 pm #

    i like this post šŸ™‚

    • cherryblossomraine March 26, 2012 at 12:09 am #

      thank you šŸ™‚ hahahah i thought you might. i was trying to figure out what to write about, things that would have my thoughts and my opinion that are befitting to my blog. cuz sometimes i just dont have any thoughts and i just write songs and poems or whatever. and they’re not really about things.

      i’m trying to make my blog more like a blog, so hopefully you’ll see more posts about things like this haha

  2. cookiececilia April 2, 2012 at 4:47 am #

    This is quite intriguing and thoughtful šŸ™‚

    • cherryblossomraine April 16, 2012 at 2:44 am #

      oh thank you! haha šŸ™‚ You should write in your blog šŸ˜›

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